LIfe...

You start life with a clean slate. Then you begin to make your mark. You face decisions, make choices. You keep moving forward. But sooner or later there comes a time where you look back over where you have been and wonder who you really are.

I don't know if I'm getting better or just used to the pain.

I know it seems like I'm this strong person who can get though anything, but inside I'm fragile. I've had so many things thrown at me, and each one has only made a crack. What I'm afraid of is shattering.

Maybe I am crazy but laughing makes the pain pass by.

I love sleep. My life has this tendency to fall apart when I'm awake.

I know what its like to want to die; how it hurts to smile; how you try to fit in but you can't; how you hurt yourself on the outside; to try to kill the thing that's in the inside.

Even the people who never frown eventually breakdown.

How can you understand me when I can't understand myself?

I hate what I have become to escape what I hated being.

It's like I realized that way down inside, I've always been lonely for something. But I don't know what for. It's like everybody in the world want's something. Only they never really know exactly what it is - they just keep finding out what it's not. You know how, when you turn off the TV or you come out of some concert, and everything just feels empty? Like you thought that would be what you wanted, and then it wasn't?

You look at me and think, 'he's so happy' but there's so much behind this little smile that you will never know.

Do you ever have those times you cry and you don't know why?

People are always telling me to smile, like smiling is going to just take away all the hurt and pain. Well I've tried that I've tried hiding my sorrows and covering the sadness in smiles and what I've learned is that when it hurts this much inside your heart always has a way of showing it no matter how many masks you wear.

Let no one think I gave in.

The pain is there to remind me that I'm still alive.

It seems to me that the harder I try the harder I fall.

Refuse to feel anything at all, refuse to slip, refuse to fall, can't be weak, can't stand still, watch your back because no one else will.

There's no excuse for the need to take your own life away, everyone passes through some rough obstacles if life, just face them as they come along, there's always a way to overcome those obstacles, and learn from your experiences.

If you can't solve it, it isn't a problem - it's reality. And sometimes reality is the hardest thing to understand and the thing that takes the longest to realize. But once it hits you in the face you'll never forget it. It will always be there in your memories and sometimes that is the best way to look at it.

It's funny the way you can get use to the tears and the pain.

What do you do when you become too scared, too scared to live, too scared to die, too scared to love, too scared to even care?

You can't just hug me and say it's okay because right n... it doesn't feel that w...

Sometimes the littlest thing in life changes something forever and there will be times when you wish you can go back to how things used to be but you just can't because things have changed so much.

I just wish I could roll back the clocks to when things were the same... then we were all just a bunch of crazy young people looking for a wild time. But now, thing aren't the same. Each of us have gone our different ways. We change, people change, things just change.